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After his Ignoble Disgrace, Satan was being expelled from
Heaven. As he passed through the Gates, he paused a moment in thought,
and turned to God and said, "A new creature called Man, I hear, is soon
to be created."
"This is true," He replied.
"He will need laws," said the Demon slyly.
"What! You, his appointed Enemy for all Time! You ask for the
right to make his laws?"
"Oh, no!" Satan replied, "I ask only that he be allowed to
make his own."
It was so granted.
-- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
morganth boosted

Me: Life is a mystery, everyone must stand alone. I hear you call my name and it feels like home.
Priest: I don't believe that is an actual prayer...
Me: No, but it's like a prayer.

Come to think of it, I’ve walked into a fair few bars in my life, and I’ve never once had a bartender ask me, “why the long face?”

A giraffe walks into a bar, and the bartender says, “why the long neck?”

I’ve been seeing a bunch of new users on the timeline. Welcome! We love new users.

That said, new users, please CW your political posts. One of the reasons I left facesite is that there, you can run into all kinds of nastiness that you’re totally unprepared for. Here, that CW button gives you a moment to prepare yourself. But only if people use it.

I will mute people for unwarned politics, and I know I’m not the only one.

An "Iron Fist" ride that you keep meaning to ride one of these times that you come to the park, but there's always a more exciting ride you'd rather go on instead.

Okay, I think I've beaten the "MCU Theme Park" idea to death now.

Food, more MCU theme park silliness Show more

A Hawkeye ride that's one of those "shoot straight up into the air and then plummet back down" ones, themed to look like you're being fired from a gigantic bow.

A sign for Inhumans that you think will be another ride, but it turns out to just be the toilets.

An Iron Man coaster that’s fast, like flying around in the Iron Man suit, but also so loopy that you feel tipsy by the time you get off.

Black Panther spoilers, more theme park silliness Show more

A Falcon ride that's a hanging rollercoaster, with lots of twists and loops.

A Loki ride that's actually four rides back to back, and the first one's really fun but by the fourth one it's getting really old.

A Thor ride that's a wild rollercoaster painted to look like the Rainbow Bridge.

A Black Widow ride that doesn't exist, but there's a sign saying they'll build one eventually after they're done making rides for all of the male heroes.

An Ant-Man animatronic ride where everything's gigantic, to make you feel really small.

A Doctor Strange ride that's one of those "giant screen + tilting room" virtual rollercoasters, simulating the experience of being on those buildings as they twist and fold.

A Guardians of the Galaxy indoor rollercoaster, where you're shooting aliens that pop out at you from all angles, while 70s music plays.

A Captain America ride that's one of those tall spinning ones, that looks like you're spinning on his shield.